雙生火焰關係的八個階段——是你的經歷嗎？
.圖/WIX
The love experienced between two reunited twin flames is like a wild beast.
在重遇的雙生火焰之間，愛像是猛獸。
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It can’t be captured. It can’t be contained. It can’t be tamed. Instead, it burns fiercely with an unquenchable form of intensity that is both exhilarating and formidable. The love experienced between twin flames is like Holy Fire: it burns you to ashes, but it also forges you into a new creature, like a Phoenix emerging out of the dust.
它不可能被捉、不可以被困、也不會被馴服。反之，它像毫不受限的烈火，興奮而懾人。火焰的愛像是聖火，將你燃成灰燼、但也練就你的新生，像從灰燼中出頭來的鳳凰。
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Although every twin flame relationship is unique and can’t be simplified, there is a general pattern that tends to emerge in these unions. As a person who went through a twin flame fusion, I know how overwhelming (and even terrifying) such an experience can be. I would have loved to read an article on common tell-tale twin flame signs when I was going through such a disorientating experience. But back then I knew nothing of twin flames or their significance. So here I would like to provide you with what I lacked: a general map that can help to guide you and pinpoint where you are right now.
儘管每對雙生火焰都是獨特的，不可被簡化。但在重聚時，還是會有概括性趨勢可見。作為走過火焰整合的人，我知道這種體驗有多麼壓倒性（甚至恐怖）。當我迷失方向時，我多麼想要讀一篇把雙生火焰的常見信號，寫成娓娓道來故事的文章。可那時我對雙生火焰和其意義一無所知。所以，我想要提供一些我當時缺乏的——一張總括性的指引地圖，讓你知道你現在在哪裡。
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8 Major Twin Flame Stages
八個主要的雙生火焰階段
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Twin flames are said to be beings that aid our souls in finding completion. Ancient Greek philosopher Plato first created the idea of souls “split in two” that eternally yearn to find their “other halves.” These days we still carry around this idea of “find our other half,” but unfortunately we believe that it is absolutely imperative for us to find another person to be complete. Please keep in mind that while twin flames do help us to experience unconditional love and grow immensely as people, not all of us find our twin flames, and not all of us need twin flames to feel complete. Please read “7 Common Myths Embellishing Twin Flame Relationships” to read more about this.
雙生火焰是能夠引動我們靈魂找到完整的存在。古希臘哲學家柏拉圖創造了靈魂分裂成二，而終會找到另一半的觀念。至今，我們仍帶著這個要找到另一半的概念。可惜，我們信了要找到使我們完整的另一半至關重要。請記住，雙生火焰確實幫助我們體驗無條件的愛，以人的方式大步成長起來。不是所有的人都找火焰，也不是所有的人都需要火焰才感覺完整。（Please read “7 Common Myths Embellishing Twin Flame Relationships” to read more about this.）
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Also, it helps to remember that the degree to which you can experience harmony in your twin flame relationship is dependent on your level of soulful maturity. For example, two old souls will have a much easier time at “holding it all together” than two young souls. You can read more about soul ages.
而且，這讓我們我們記得，你在雙生火焰關係的和諧感，取決於你的靈性成熟度。例如比起年輕的靈魂，兩個老靈魂相遇，會更容易在一起。（You can read more about soul ages.）
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So keeping this in mind, what are the eight major twin flame stages that you’ll likely experience in your relationship?
所以，記住了：你在關係裡面的八個可能階段是怎樣的呢？
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Stage One – Yearning for “The One”
階段一：渴望「對的人」
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In this preliminary stage, you have spent your entire life pining for “The One” that doesn’t yet exist in your life. You have this strange sensation that someone who is perfectly molded to you is “out there” but you don’t quite know where or when they will appear in your life. Although you ache for your twin flame, you have a feeling they will appear to you at some point.
事前，你花了一生的時間，確定「那一個」沒出現在生命裡。你有奇怪的感應，某個完美符合你的人「就在那」，只是不知道什麼地點或時間會出現。你非常渴望你的雙生靈，儘管你已感覺到他們將會在某個點出現。
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This stage is also sometimes spent “preparing” for the arrival of the twin flame on an unconscious level. In my instance, I had to learn how to love myself before I met mine. For others, this stage of preparation involves the development of self-awareness, discovery, and understanding.
本階段會在無意識層面準備雙生火焰的到來。以我來說，在遇到火焰前，我學習如何自愛。對其他人而言，這準備階段包含了拓展自我覺知、發現和理解的能力。
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Stage Two – Glimpsing “The One”
階段二：瞥見對的人
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At some point, you will have a brief glimpse of your twin flame. Whether this is through a dream signal, or through a real-life meeting, suddenly the Beloved can be sensed. The result is profound. Wonder, joy, anxiety, and intoxication quickly ensue. For those cautious among us, a lingering sense of intense curiosity and desire to get to know the person better is the result. You don’t know what it is exactly, but this person is extremely special. Like me, you may even sense that this person will play an immensely important role in your life – even before you know them properly.
到某時，你會瞥見你的雙生火焰。無論是夢的信息、真實的相遇、突如其來的愛都可以被感覺得到。這是影響深遠的。奇蹟、喜悅、焦慮和沈醉隨之而來。謹慎的人會有一種揮之不去的、想要更了解這個人的好奇心和渴望。你不會知道這準確而言什麼感覺，但這個人極度特別。即使還不太認識對方，但仍感覺他在你的生命中有著毫無疑問的重要性。像我就是如此。
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Stage Three – Falling in Love
階段三：墜入愛河
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When you fall for this person, you will fall very, very hard. You will fall harder than you have ever fallen for anyone – and the impact will knock the breath right out of you. In fact, as you get to know your twin flame better, you will fall more and more deeply in love with them. As a result, you’ll find it hard to stand with two feet on the ground. You might feel disorientated, lovesick and “unlike yourself.” You may even try to resist the attraction, but eventually, you’ll accept the reality that you’re deeply and madly in love.
你愛對方的時候，將感覺非常、非常艱難。你將愛對方愛得比任何人更深，像是愛到無法喘息。實際上，當你更了解自己的火焰時，你還將愛得更甚。於是，你發現自己站不住腳了。你可能覺得迷失方向、害了相思病、變得不像自己。你還會反抗這種吸引力，但你終究會接受自己深刻而瘋狂地墜入愛河的現實。
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Stage Four – The Fairy-Tale Relationship
階段四：童話式戀愛
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As both of you eventually make your feelings known and enter into a relationship, life will feel like a fairy-tale. Your relationship with them will be perfect in every possible way. It will seem as though your twin flame fulfills every single need you have and everything you ever possibly wanted. This taste of “paradise” is what the matured twin flame relationship looks like after the next few stages of turmoil.
你們雙方最終都會心意相通，然後在一起。生命像童話。你和他們之間的關係，將會在任何的面向都完美。雙生火焰似乎能滿足你的每個可能需要。（而）這種「天堂」般的味道，（其實）是成熟的雙生火焰歷經後階段動盪的收成。
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Stage Five – Outer Turmoil and Inner Purging
階段五：動盪在外，淨化在內
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In this stage, there is trouble in paradise. As the ecstasy from the initial meeting period wears off, egos start to flare up. Suddenly differences in opinion, taste, and personality arise, and old core wounds emerge out of the gloom. While our twin flames share and mirror our deepest needs, desires, and dreams, they also tend to mirror our shadow selves. For example, if you are an emotionally repressed person, your twin flame will likely be emotionally explosive. If you tend to be arrogant, your twin flame will most likely be uncertain and quiet. In this way our twin flames challenge us, riling up our insecurities. This can be infuriating, devastating and very painful.
這階段中的天堂是有困境的。隨著最初的狂喜開始消退，小我便爆炸。你們的意見、品味和個性產生分歧。舊有的核心傷痕從陰霾中浮出。然而，雙生火焰和我們共享與映照最深的需要、慾望和夢想。他們也會映照出小我的陰影。例如，你若是一個壓抑情緒的人，你的火焰就可能是情緒爆炸的人。如果你有自大傾向，你的火焰就會不太確鑿且安靜。我們的雙生火焰會用這種方式來挑戰我們，挑起我們的不安。這可能是狂躁、具破壞性而痛苦的。
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While all the arguing and fighting in this stage may seem disastrous, the truth is that it is necessary for our growth. Without being provoked, without seeing ourselves for who we “really” are, we live in illusion and fail to grow soulfully. But this is certainly hard to realize while you’re going through such turbulence in your relationship!
此階段，所有的爭吵和鬥爭看起來是災難性的，而真相是這對我們的成長是必要的。我們在沒被挑釁、無法看清真正的自己時，會活在錯覺中，且無法靈性成長。只是，當你身處於著動盪的關係時，當然很難覺知如是的真相。
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Stage Six – The Runner and Chaser
階段六：逃跑的人和追逐的人
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As tensions mount it is common for one partner (or sometimes both) to emotionally or physically withdraw and “run” away, and another to pursue in a game of cat and mouse. Sometimes this involves emotional shutdown and silent treatments. Other times this involves physical separation and in extreme cases, the permanent termination of the relationship. In this stage, twin flames experience a trial by fire. While some relationships last and are strengthened, others crumble to pieces. As I mentioned at the start, this is all dependent on each partner’s soulful maturity. Sometimes one partner leaves for many years and then returns, only to repeat the cycle once again. The chaser, on the other hand, tends to be the more mentally and emotionally mature partner of the two, trying to sort everything out and make amends.
隨著情勢的白熱化，關係中的其中一位（有時兩個都會）在情緒或身體層面上抽離並逃走。而另一位則像是玩貓追老鼠的遊戲。這是很常見的。偶爾，這牽涉情緒層面的關機和「無聲的療癒」。其他的話，則可能涉及實際的分離，極端的個案會永久結束關係。在此階段，雙生火焰歷經火的試煉。有的關係會繼續且不斷強化，但有的則會被撕成碎片。正如我開初所提到的，這完全取決於每對雙生火焰的靈性成熟度。有時，某一半會在離開多年後回來，卻只是重蹈覆轍。那邊廂，追逐的人相對地是兩個人間智性和情感層面更成熟的人，他會嘗試釐清所有事、修補和校正。
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Stage Seven – Surrender and Dissolution
階段七：臣服與和解
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Once the shadow of your relationship has been revealed, you may experience a period of surrender. After so much anguish, distress and provocation, you both begin to open up about your wounds and insecurities. In this stage, it is common to experience a lot of ego dissolution and soulful expansion. As the ego relaxes, powerful lessons are learned about the nature of oneself and the nature of the “other.” As you begin learning how to work through your differences, the maturity of your relationship deepens and thus strengthens.
It is common to go through stages six and seven many times throughout your relationship.
一旦關係中的陰影被揭開，你會有一段臣服的時期。經歷了如此多的煎熬、揪心和觸怒後，你們對自身的傷口和不安有更強的開放感。此階段你們體驗到小我消融和靈性擴張。隨著小我的放鬆，我們了解到自己和他人的本質。這是強而有力的一課。當你開始學習如何在差異裡相處時，關係的成熟度會加深和加強。你們的關係在階段六和階段七中來來回回，是常見的。
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Stage Eight – Oneness
階段八：合一
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As the problems in your relationship become increasingly easy to deal with, you will enter a period of soul reunion. In stage eight it is common for you to both find a shared meaning, passion or cause that brings you a mutual sense of fulfillment. As the ego continues to relax, virtues such as forgiveness, understanding, empathy, and patience are learned. The more you both work through each issue that comes your way vigilantly, the more you experience the sensation of “Oneness,” or ego death.
當你們關係中的難題，驚奇地容易解決時，你會進入靈魂重聚的時期。在階段八，你們找到相通的意義、激情和原動力。這將帶給你們成就感。隨著小我放寬心，寬恕、理解、同理和耐心等美德將會被培養出來。你們兩人越能覺知地走過課題，你們越能夠體驗到合一和小我之死。
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【原作者介紹@LonerWolf】
Walk the path less travelled
走向那讓你飛越的路途
Our names are Aletheia Luna and Mateo Sol and we currently live in Perth, Western Australia.
我們的名字是Aletheia Luna和Mateo Sol，現居Perth (Western Australia)。
Our mission is to help others embrace the path of the lone wolf and listen to the soul’s calling. Our goal is to provide a grounded and balanced perspective of spirituality that doesn’t bypass the raw, real, and messy aspects of spiritual growth or psychological development.
幫助他人擁抱孤獨的旅程，傾聽靈魂的召喚是我們的使命。我們不繞過最粗糙、真實又混亂的面向——那靈性和心理成長必經之路，讓靈性更「接地氣」以及中立。
We are deeply drawn to exploring and exposing both the light and shadow side of human nature and spirituality. We strive towards integration, balance, wholeness, and embracing both the sacred and wild aspects of being human. Read more.
我們深入探索和揭露人性的光輝和陰影。我們駛向整合、平和、「一」的道路，擁抱人類最神聖和野性的面向。閱讀更多。
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